Zero to Meltdown in a Matter of Moments

My chunky girl. The good 'ol days when she used to sleep.

My chunky girl. The good ‘ol days when she used to sleep.

I don’t think I was fully prepared for the toddler struggles. It was like a switch was turned on once she hit 2. If I mention it to other parents, it’s met with “just wait until she is 3!” Every person’s perception is their own reality. I’m sure 3 has struggles as well. We aren’t there yet. 2 is overwhelming right now.

My sweet, happy girl has turned into a very emotional, stubborn, opinionated and independent child. Not saying these are bad qualities. I love that she has a strong personality. It’s the adjustment to all the temper tantrums that I was not fully prepared for.

You can make all these plans for how you want to parent and raise your child. Once you actually have a child these plans become obsolete. You can plan and plan and read all the parenting books; all the tips may not be applicable to you. You might think you have things figured out and your child will be like; “nope, but thanks for trying.”

We are still struggling with sleep. It has been getting worse. We try to let her “cry it out” she gets so upset. I am seriously fearful that I am causing her psychological harm. It just feels awful. Then you have other parents tell you that if you give in, your child wins. No, no one wins when no one gets sleep. No one wins when a child, your child is struggling with something but can’t articulate what she is feeling.

We have also given in and try to rock her to sleep. Or I have tried to sleep with her in her toddler bed. This is becoming a regular thing unfortunately, it’s not my favorite. I will have her asleep, and in a deep sleep; the second I leave she pops awake and screams. The past couple of nights we have been bringing her into our bed to sleep. While I’m not thrilled with the idea of co-sleeping; I am stoked about the idea of sleep in general. I enjoy sleep. I will do just about anything to sleep.

Toddler feet in my face all night? Sure. If it means I can sleep, I’m all in. If this means that my child isn’t making herself throw up in the middle of the night because she’s so upset, I am in. I don’t know if this promotes temper tantrums during the day. I don’t know if this teaches her to keep fighting until she gets her way. I do know I have tried many methods. Some work. Some don’t. Some work for a week or 2 then are no longer effective.

Another lovely pasttime when baby girl would snuggle up in a sleep sack. Those things were magical!

Another lovely past time when baby girl would snuggle up in a sleep sack. Those things were magical!

What I do know is that at times I miss my sweet, cuddly, chubby baby. I miss her sleeping all night long for 12 hours straight. We really had it good, naively hoping it would last. I know so many mama’s and parents in general struggle with sleep issues. I hope we find a solution that works for us. I hope we get some good sleep in the very near future. Once again, I am writing as my toddler is crying hysterically while plopped on the floor in her room. She is starting to quiet down. Heartbreaking. Heartbreaking for me as well. Can I cry too? If I did would anyone come scoop me up and rock me to sleep? Maybe I’ll try the temper tantrum method with my mom and see if I get as much sympathy as I give my daughter. I’m guessing that would be a no. An empathic no.

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