5 Things I Really Had to Say to My Toddler This Week

1) We do NOT put drumsticks in the kitty’s litter box:

Yes. I found my little girl in the laundry room, digging around the litter box with some drumsticks. I asked her what she was doing, she said; “playing.” I told her we don’t do that. She laughed of course. Then I had to thoroughly wash her hands, and mine….several times. Gross!

2) We do NOT wash our hands in applesauce:

She had some applesauce with her dinner. I was cleaning up the kitchen. Then I hear a sweet voice say; “I clean my hands.” She enjoys washing her hands and helping clean lately. However, this time she was cleaning then in her applesauce. Of course she made sure to get some between every finger. Then she spread it onto the counter and her chair. It was fun.

3) No, you may not get naked in front of your friends:

We had some of her friends come over yesterday. She likes older kids. They leave their clothes on. Not sure why she felt the need to strip in the living room. But she did. Then strutted away with her cute cheeks hanging out.

4) The fridge is not a good place for a nap:

This one scares me a bit. She now knows how to open the fridge and freezer doors. Except she is fascinated by trying to fit in, and tries to close the door. Thank goodness she is too big to actually succeed at this. She likes to kind of sit in the door and try to snack on pickles. Yep.

5) The carpet does not need to be blow-dried:

This one is kinda my fault. I can’t leave her alone for 1 second. And I mean, literally 1 second. I was blow drying my hair in the hallway. For some reason my outlets in my bathroom and the guest bathroom aren’t working. The breakers seem to be fine. Anyway, I was drying my hair in the hallway. I left it on the floor to let the dog back inside. Then I hear the smoke detectors going off. My sweet angel was holding the blow dryer on the carpet. In the middle of the hallway. You can’t hide it. It’s been a really fun week. I mean, really super fun. I don’t even know where she comes up with these ideas.

I’m pretty certain that this child is the main reason I have to dye my hair frequently now. I’m not quite 32. I’ve had to dye my hair for a couple of years now. My daughter is 2. Coincidence? I think not. I need help! Grey is not flattering with my skin tone.

(Photo Credit: The Chive)

5 responses to “5 Things I Really Had to Say to My Toddler This Week

  1. Hahahaha! I find myself saying some pretty funny things too. Gosh the things our kids make us say!

  2. That’s hilarious! My favorite thing I heard myself say once was, “Bigie, we don’t chew on old pantyhose we dig out of the sandbox!” Lol

  3. Oh my Gosh! I think our little girls could be best friends! Sounds just like my little one. =)

    • I’m sure they would love being naughty and adventurous with a buddy, while we would be sobbing in the corner. I feel like I”m ready for this day to get over. As I was writing this post actually, my daughter pulled eggs out of the fridge and was throwing them. She tried to get naked at a pumpkin patch, and once we were home, handed me a very full poopy diaper…..that spilled all over the floor. 2 is rough.