Help Me! I’m Trapped

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At least part of that statement is true. Haha! Not being able to drive is beyond frustrating. I feel like a burden to those that have to drive me around. I can’t do what I want, when I want. As a grown woman, not being allowed to do what I want makes me feel like a child again. I hate it!

I have two different neck braces. A soft collar that looks like it’s not really doing anything. It isn’t super supportive in preventing me from moving my neck. I like that one best because it’s more comfortable and I feel free. The downside is that I have been walking in the July heat and my neck has been sweating profusely. I dare you to smell my neck brace! It’s gross, and that says a lot coming from me.

My other collar is one that is to be used more for the shower. It gives my neck so much more support and my movements are restricted that is probably the best for my neck to heal. This thing is sweaty. It’s kind of a foam brace. It’s not comfortable at all and makes me feel super claustrophobic. I don’t care to feel like I’m suffocating and I feel that ALL the time when I’m wearing this neck brace.

PC: driverlayer.com

I just had dinner and I was struggling to eat. Then I remembered that the surgeon said that I’m allowed to take off the brace for meals. I’m glad I remembered because it would have taken me 2,476 hours to eat otherwise. I still only have minimal pain, but the nerve in the back of my neck is painful today. So far, I haven’t needed pain meds and only take the Valium or Flexeril to take the edge off the sore muscles. And they help me sleep which I love. I am thrilled I can sleep again.

When I was eating dinner my right side, a couple of inches higher than my hip bone is feeling crampy. I’m hoping it’s just gas. It doesn’t feel like it’s related to the incision site at all. It could be that I have only pooped once since last Tues. Don’t worry I won’t stick anymore lollipop sticks up there. I mean, I totally would, but my mom and some of my friends are horrified by that. It worked so I don’t care in the slightest.

PC: quotesgram.com

I want to be better now. I am not a patient person. If God wanted me to have patience, He would have built me that way. That’s my great excuse to never have to work on my patience. You can’t argue with God. I’m so sick of this neck brace though. I know it’s there to help me heal properly, blah blah blah. I’m going to burn them once I’m done!

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This is kind of what my neck looks like. This isn’t a picture of me. I wonder if I’ll get copies from my surgery, because that would be amazing. I won’t set off alarms at the airport though. I guess I’m not important enough to have enough metal to set off alarms. I know it’s all in my head, but I feel like I can feel the screws each time I swallow. It bugs me. It creeps me out to have foreign objects in my body. I will have to get used to it because these suckers aren’t coming out. Darn.

PC: pinterest.com

The above picture shows what they did to my neck basically. Not having the disc pinch my nerve anymore is incredible. Seriously, I was in SOOO much pain and even though I’m bored, frustrated, inconvenienced, etc. I’m in such a better place than I have been in months. For that, I’m grateful. Don’t be fooled this will be a roller coaster and there is probably a good bit of complaining in the near future. XOXO

 

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