Yes folks, today was another struggle. Instead of going into all the details, I talked about it on my Podcast, wrote a letter to myself and went for a walk with my mom.
I’m sick of this neck brace. I’m sick of not getting to pick up my daughter. I’m sick of not being able to drive. I’m sick of the next pain still. I’m sick of my brain being in a constant stage of confusion.
All you divorced folks out there, do you have specific schedules? We have a 5-2-2-5 Schedule. So one of us gets Mondays and Tuesdays, the other gets Wednesdays and Thursdays and we alternate weekends. We have been doing great exchanging days for holidays, birthdays, random things coming up, whatever. He and I work really well as a team.
Since the surgery our parenting schedule had been all messed up. Since I can’t take care of her by herself my mom either stays at my place and brings my daughter with her, or she will take us down to my parents house for my weekends. While I’m delighted that I even get to see her, I don’t want to have a baby sitter to spend time with my kid. Although, I do think it’s crucial until I’m cleared for the weight restriction, because the goofball is hyper and wants me to do somersaults with her once my neck brace is gone. The main point though, is with the changes in the parenting schedule and the meds and being loopy, I am all jumbled in my head. I never know what day it is. Because I’d normally have her today so I think it’s Thursday, but it’s not. Then I thought it was Monday, but apparently that isn’t the case either. I’m all over the place and it really stresses me out.
I hate the head fog feeling. On the plus side, I wanted a donut today, a long john specifically with chocolate on top and angel cream in the middle. Yum.. Instead I ate a peach. Then made a pan of brownies and melted marshmallows on top. Yay me! I have no idea what 10lbs is, but that brownie pan felt heavy. I’m sure there is no way near 10lbs, but then what does that say about me? I am seriously out of shape and my baby arms can’t lift anything. No strong man competitions in my future.
Hope you all got brownies, marshmallows, or brownies with marshmallows on this summer evening. And thank those that help you when you need it, even if you have too much pride to ask for it. Words can’t express my gratitude to my mother. She is most definitely overbearing and annoys me easily, but I love her to death and am forever grateful that she has taken care of me, even though she has a ton to deal with on her plate. I do love you mom, even when I’m a raging bitch I love you. You still are not a Dr. though so stop with the medical advice. Love ya!
Night everyone. XOXO