Tag Archives: My Husband is a Saint

Birthday Surprises…I HATE Surprises

I am not a very social person. I like spending time with people I’m extremely comfortable with, and usually in small groups. I like structure. I like to know what is going on and what to expect. I do not take surprises well. I get overwhelmed easily. My friends know this. My family knows this. My husband knows this.

(PC: the berry)

I love celebrating my friends and family’s birthdays. I don’t like celebrating my own. I never have. I usually get really depressed around my birthday. I remember when I was 10, my mom made me a chocolate cake and the number 10 was designed on the cake with those pumpkin candies. I remember thinking; “wow, my life is going by so quickly. I’m getting old.” Silly, right? Well those clearly rational thoughts have never gone away.

(I don’t know who to credit for this photo, my best friend texted it to me one day after finding it online)

This is a long story so stay with me. While my family was planning my birthday they asked me where I wanted to eat. I said; “lunch at mom’s house.” What is better than your favorite meal made by your mother? Nothing. My mom tried to convince me to go to a restaurant to celebrate. She asked me at least 20 different times leading up to my birthday. I complained to my husband about how I can’t understand why my mom is so pushy about going to a restaurant. My sister and I both have little ones. Taking little kids to a restaurant is a nightmare. I wanted to relax and be around the people I love.

My husband asked me what I wanted to do several times. Again, I said eat lunch at my parents house and then nothing. I wanted to relax and read. Then, my best friend asked if I wanted to get a couples massage with her for my birthday. Absolutely! Relaxing with my best friend sounds lovely. Not too much effort on my part. Great! Done! I asked my husband if he would be okay with this, he seemed excited that I’d want to do something for my day.

(My BF, daughter and me before leaving for the massage)

We arrived at the spa and checked in. Then my BF was looking at her phone and I glanced over and saw my husbands name in her Facebook messenger. I asked her why they were talking. She turned bright red and said it’s none of my business. The wheels started spinning in my head, but I was drawing a blank. I knew then there was a surprise but I didn’t know what it was. I asked her if I would hate it. She said no. I asked her 2 more times while getting our massages. I thought having her relaxed would make her more likely to talk, it didn’t. I was hoping that whatever it was, that it would be low-key. Like very few, if any, other people involved. I was and always will be perfectly okay hanging out by myself and isolating. Socializing is a lot of work.

After the massages, we drove into our neighborhood. I spotted my parent’s cars while pulling up to my house. I was confused, but then thought how nice he’s having my parents and sister come over. I walked in the house and saw one of my dearest friends standing in my kitchen. I was very confused because I wasn’t expecting to see her. Then I looked over and saw my aunt and uncle. They live in Ohio. I kind of stared at them, then it registered that they came to see me! What?!?! Amazing! My sister, brother in-law, nephews, best friends, parents, aunt and uncle and darling friends from high school all came to my house to celebrate me. My husband had been planning this for 3 months. I had no idea. I wasn’t expecting it at all. I was slightly overwhelmed with tons of people at my house. But, I felt so completely loved and honored that people would come fly/drive really far to see me, all of them just to spend time with me for my b-day.

I hate surprises. Did I already say that?  I do. Almost always. But NOT this one. As much as I dread my birthday, this year was by far my most favorite birthday. I found out that my husband was trying to surprise me at a restaurant initially and had tried to get my mom to convince me to go out to eat (this didn’t click with me until he explained it; I promise I’m not stupid). When it was clear I wouldn’t go out to eat, he asked my best friend to take me to get massages. He paid for them. For 80 minutes! It was the best massage of my life! So much fun getting a couples massage with your bestie, I highly recommend it. After we left to get massages, my aunt and mom came to my house and they, along with my husband cleaned it. They had dinner waiting for me. Cupcakes. Loved ones. All there for me. I may not always express to my husband how much I appreciate him, but he is amazing. I really hit the jackpot with this one. For him to do something so kind and thoughtful and wanted to include my loved ones is just over the top. Besides having the best husband, I really do have a terrific family and the most wonderful friends anyone could ever have.

(This guy…my heart..he totally has it)

Yeah…and a couple of months ago I didn’t know what to get him. Yep, I sure did hand him our daughter and said “your welcome.” That’s a pretty good gift. Now I really need to make up for that one. I’m not a bad wife, I promise. He’s just so hard to buy for. He has everything. He buys what he wants. I can’t afford the things that he would love to have. At the end of the day, gifts don’t really matter. This surprise party was one of the best gifts I’ve ever gotten. I will remember this for the rest of my life. Words can never express how much this birthday meant to me. Every one of those people who helped me celebrate my birthday mean the world to me. For those of my friends who read my blog, I adore you all. Truly and with my whole heart.

Oh and I still got to have my favorite meal prepared by my loving mom. I’m a very lucky lady. Young lady. I’m young!

DIY Pallet Art – Colorado Flag

I have an endless supply to all the pallets my heart could ever desire. Thanks hubby for needing them for your job. I probably could try and attempt to make other things besides CO flags and mountains, but I don’t really want to. It’s very cathartic for me. Something soothing about repetitive behaviors that are mindless sometimes.

My husband takes a part the pallets and usually puts them together for me. Sometimes I put them back together. Really I help put them back together when I want pictures for the blog. Why do it when my husband is willing do, am I right? Yay for awesome husbands.

Once the pallet is taken a part, we use one of the boards, cut it in half and screw it onto the back of the pallets so it’s solid.

We use various size pallets and eyeball the size we think we want to go with. I started by making them 2-3 feet wide. This took me FOREVER to finish them. If they are made too small, then it looks weird. To me anyway. I think 1-2 feet wide is a good size.

Once again, I just eyeball what the CO flag looks like. Thank goodness the CO flag is pretty simple. I use my screw gun and go to town. This is what I feel is the most time consuming part.

Once all the screws are in, I typically start with the blue and just make patterns that I think look pretty. There isn’t a specific way to do this. Even for the large ones, once the screws are in it takes me about 2 hours to string the pallets. Once I get going, I can go pretty fast. If I’m doing a mountain scene (I’ll post those at another time) it takes a lot longer.

This has just been a fun activity for me to do. Now our garage is filled with several pallets awaiting me to string them.

What to get my Husband for His Birthday?

My husband and daughter’s birthdays are rapidly approaching. Their birthdays are 2 days a part. My daughter is almost 2, can you believe it? I swear I was just pregnant with her. 

I started going into labor on my husband’s 30th birthday. 2 Days later, our tiny, early love was born. While I did get him gifts for his birthday, I claimed that our daughter was the main gift. Obviously! She’s fantastic. Can this be the gift that keeps on giving? Can I use her for the gift each year? Like ‘here honey, Happy Birthday, remember that one year I made you a human? Yeah, you’re welcome!’ But seriously, can I?

He is the most difficult person to shop for. I don’t care for his birthday, Father’s Day or Christmas. He buys what he wants when he wants it. Or he wants ridiculous things that I can’t afford, and we don’t need. I am a social worker. A part-time social worker. Part-time. I am not bringing in the big bucks here. I can buy you a hug. Is that sufficient? I try to buy activities or experiences since he has ALL the stuff, ALL of it! These are more meaningful. However, some of the experiences we haven’t done yet. That would require us to leave our daughter over night. I still think neither one of us are ready for that yet.

He wants an ice cream cake. He’s lactose intolerant. Supposedly. Or should I say, he is selectively lactose intolerant. That’s more accurate. He won’t eat mac and cheese because it has too much cheese, but lasagna is fine. Regardless, ice cream cake it is, because it’s his day!

It’s not that I’ve waited until the last minute to get him something because I forgot. It’s because I can not think of a single thing he wants or needs. Because of this, I am very seriously considering putting a bow on our daughter and telling him “you’re welcome.” He can’t return it or say he doesn’t like it. Win-win, right? Yep, he’s getting an almost 2 year old. She’s not brand new, but I would classify her as a pretty entertaining and wonderful gift. Happy Birthday to my 2 loves!

The Mystery of the Missing Tampon

* Be Warned this is a relatively graphic post, proceed with caution *

Okay…so today started out very lovely. I was able to spend the day at a lake with my family and one of my dear friends for her birthday. It was relaxing and full of fun chit-chat. I got to meet her sister and cousin. It felt easy and comfortable. Ideal day, right?

Well, we were tubing and attempting to water ski behind the boat. I haven’t skied since I was maybe 12 I think. Even then, I wasn’t good. My husband is a good and patient instructor. I am competitive and impatient. We make a great team. I want to be amazing at everything immediately.

Since skiing is difficult and my legs are rude, I struggled getting up. I did get up a couple of times, success! Even if it was only for a second, it counts. It totally counts! Except each time I fell over it felt like I was having a colonoscopy or had a hose up my vagina. I even peed a little once we got off the boat. I’m pretty classy like that. Since my bladder surgery I have come to expect that I will pee at the most inappropriate times and won’t be able to control it.

Side note, my daughter tubed for the first time. We went at a snail’s pace, but she loved it. She’s just the sweetest!

Pardon the picture, the lighting wasn't been cooperative

Pardon the picture, the lighting wasn’t being cooperative

I also think that sometimes my husband is trying to kill me. He threw me off the tube pretty hard. Once again, I will probably have a post that makes no sense. I have a splitting headache. My husband is 100% responsible. Clearly, I take no blame even though I asked him to go faster.

Somehow during the chaos of the skiing, tubing, gabbing and eating yummy treats, it slipped my mind that I had a tampon in. I had an IUD placed a couple of months ago and have been on a light period for the past 2 months. I’m crabby and crampy. Since the period is almost constant I forget to wear one sometimes, or forget that I’m wearing one at all. I get home and tried to take my tampon out. I couldn’t find the string. Panic set in immediately.

I recently read an article where someone died from toxic shock syndrome. I’d been wearing the same one since early this morning. While trying to find the string I just pushed it further inside me. So many thoughts ran through my head. I worried that I would have to go to the hospital to have it removed. That would have been so embarrassing. Do I call an ambulance? Is this a crisis? I tried to push like you would when birthing a child. Not the same thing I found.

I went downstairs and told my husband that I had a problem. I told him that I couldn’t find my tampon and I didn’t know what to do. He made a rather unfunny comment about returning to the lake to get his fishing rod to search and rescue the tampon. I wasn’t amused.

Thank goodness he is so sweet. He went to the garage and grabbed what is quite possibly the largest flashlight I have ever seen. He looked pretty pleased with himself. Without going into too graphic of detail, he had the flashlight and got some tweezers and started to have himself a look. After some digging and weird comments; he found the string!!!! With his help we retrieved the missing tampon. For a minute I was pretty freaked out, as I wouldn’t have any idea what to do if I couldn’t get it out.

My husband, who hates blood, needles and anything medical, stated that he should have been a doctor. (Eye roll). Today was weird. Mostly relaxing and fun. My body is weird. I think I’ve realized that anything that is odd that can go wrong with my body does indeed happen. I shouldn’t even be surprised anymore. Obviously, no one wants to see gross pictures of tampons. So here is a picture of my cat wearing my daughter’s rash guard. He wanted to come swimming, but doesn’t like water so it was a bit of a predicament. Enjoy!

Feline Friday #2

Toggle is the 2nd pet we got. I was going through a very difficult point in my life and felt lonely. I was hanging out with some of my friends who were looking at the local humane society’s page to find a dog for themselves. I asked if we could look at the cats. There was an adorable tabby kitten. I can’t even remember his name now, but I decided I wanted that kitty.

My husband, who was my boyfriend at the time, didn’t want another cat. We already had a cat, and in his mind 1 was enough. When it comes to cats, you can never just have 1. He threw a fit saying he didn’t want a kitty. Then he hands me $100 to go adopt a kitten. He tells people all the time that he didn’t want another cat, but he willingly gave me the money and now loves him! Of course I’m going to go with whichever response gets me what I want.

The cat I originally went to adopt was with another family when I got there. Then Toggle looked into my eyes and soul and he telepathically told me that we belonged together. Of course I knew right away that it was meant to be. He came home with me within the hour. He is a very tolerant kitty. He lets me put him in M’s baby clothes and shoes. He lets her pet him. He lets us hold him. He doesn’t always do it with a smile, but he does it. He is my kitty cat soul mate. He’s the kitty I have been searching my whole life for. He also sits like a weirdo and loves to show his parts to everyone.

Toggle: aka Senor, Butters, Kitty Cat Meow Meow

Born: May 2011

Adopted: July 2011

Age: 4

Color: Tabby, regal stripes, and a fuzzy head and big fat paws

Education: Doctorate in Animal Studies

Profession if a Human: Male Model, Philosopher

Psychiatric Disorder: Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Ideas of Grandeur, Agoraphobia.


* Chasing the other cats

* Getting vigorous pets, while looking at myself in the mirror

* Yelling at bobby pins

* Playing with bobby pins/safety pins and twisty ties

* Taco bell lettuce

* My mom


* Real meat (besides my dry cat food)

* Strangers

* Any situation that looks like it could be dangerous

* Forced kitty cuddle time (more on that later, ugh!)

* Rubs from the baby

* Mom dressing me in the baby’s clothes (even though I look fabulous!!)

BIO: I love to chase around bobby pins, probably my favorite activity. I can chase them for hours. I will bring them on the bed and yell so my parents will know what a great hunter I am. Then I will knock the bobby pin off the bed with my fat cat paws. I will yell so my parents will now be aware that the prey has gotten away! Oh wait, not so quick. Once I’ve sprang off the bed, I am quick to retrieve my prize. Once I get tired of that, I make sure to put the pins inside my food dish. I’m so clever, this way I won’t ever forget where my favorite things are. However, I will never ever play with the bobby pins once they have entered the food dish, in case the other kitties contaminate them with their germs. This also lets them know what a great hunter I am, lest anyone forgets.

He loves to sit like this, he's such a weirdo. Handsome, but a weirdo!

He loves to sit like this, he’s such a weirdo. Handsome, but a weirdo!